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7 most powerful letters by LGBTI people and allies in 2015

7 most powerful letters by LGBTI people and allies in 2015

bullying

‘I’m sorry… the truth is I always thought you were pretty cool and sort of attractive, and that frustrated me,’ school bully apologizes

An ex-homophobe posted an apology online to his former classmate—after coming out as gay himself.

Unsure of his own sexuality at the age of 14, ‘James’ began to bully his then classmate, ‘Nate’.

James explained on Reddit, ‘He did nothing wrong to me, and yet I still felt so afraid of him that I resorted to insults.’

Now, four years on, James has realized his homophobic bullying stemmed from a fear of his own sexuality—and decided to speak out in the hope of inspiring other young, scared LGBTI teens.

‘I can’t apologize to Nate now but if I could I would want to tell him this; I’m sorry for all the verbal harassment I put you through, the truth is I always thought you were pretty cool and sort of attractive, and that frustrated me.

‘You were always the stronger one between us both, you were proud to be you and always kept your head held high.

‘Fight on, and live an amazingly happy life with whomever you love. My thoughts are with you, please… please stay strong.’

Read more here.

 

Marriage_Equality_Ireland_0

Gay man, 60, writes touching letter dreaming of same-sex marriage in Ireland

Before Ireland became the first country to legalize gay marriage by popular vote in May, a 60-year-old gay man wrote of his struggles growing up gay in the Irish Independent newspaper in March in an effort to appeal to readers to support the legalization of same-sex marriage.

‘My hopes, dreams and aspirations have been placed on to your ballot paper. Please treat them with the utmost care as they are fragile. After some 50 years, I dare to dream.’

He added, ‘This referendum lets me entertain the idea of marriage for the first time in my 60 years, something most guys could envisage since they were born. I can only imagine the exhilaration when the referendum is passed. No doubt damaged from my experiences and still insecure, I will be actively looking, even at my age, for a partner. I do so with the ultimate intention of asking him to marry me.

‘A tear escapes at the thought. My loss has been intense and all the more vivid considering the possibility of such change now. I would have made a fantastic father. That opportunity is too late for me now. But to grow old in a “Darby and Darby” relationship of equality is hopefully not.’

He concluded: ‘When it is passed, I know I will cry, probably in private and alone, but my tears will be those of relief, acknowledgement, acceptance and hope.’

Read more here.

 

Marchers at San Francisco
Marchers at San Francisco Pride

Bisexual girl writes letter to boyfriend to explain what her orientation really means

A Gay Star News reader, who has asked to remain anonymous, posted the letter on Bisexuality Visibility Day (September 23) to raise awareness of how many people still don’t see bisexuality as ‘normal.’

‘I’m dating YOU. I only want to date you—not because I’m waiting for the right girl to come along, not because you’re ‘feminine’—but because you’re funny, attractive, kind, and I love you more than I’ve ever loved anyone,’ she wrote in a letter to her boyfriend.

‘It doesn’t mean I’m straight now. I know you hate that. I know you’d rather date a ‘normal’ woman—at least, that’s what you’ve said.

‘Except I am normal. I’m not somehow half a girlfriend. 50% of the space in my heart isn’t reserved for a woman. It’s all yours. Always.

‘I don’t expect you to understand, but it’s more like being 100% straight, and 100% gay all at once. I love people, whoever they are (and one at a time), with my whole being. And at the moment, it’s you, until you tell me otherwise.

‘My sexuality doesn’t define me, but my past does: every relationship leaves its scars. I don’t want to say I’m not bisexual anymore, because that negates the joy and pain I’ve experienced in my other relationships.’

Read more here.

 

katie_mathewson

Lesbian shocked to get loving letter from conservative grandmother about her wedding

Katie Mathewson was certain that her very conservative grandparents would never consider attending her wedding next year to another woman.

She hadn’t even told them she is a lesbian.

‘Over the years, I’ve listened quietly and sadly as they talked about people who were different from them,’ Mathewson writes on Imbur.com.

‘I accepted the sad reality that that they’d never know the real me.’

But the California woman decided to send them a letter coming out and sharing news of her engagement no matter the outcome.

Soon came a return letter in the mail.

Mathewson recaps: ‘My grandmother is Korean and English isn’t her first language, but all I needed to see was “what matters is your happiness with MacKenzie for the rest of your life … No matter what may come, we still love you very much.” It’s not perfect or poetic, but it’s genuine and it’s love and it surprised me in the best way possible.’

Read more here.

 

Rob Watson and sons
Rob Watson and sons

‘Grow up,’ gay dad to Aussie couple who threatened to divorce should same-sex marriage become legal

‘If you choose to divorce because of what this young man has achieved for himself and his life, that is your prerogative. Just as he did not blame you for his marriage, neither should you blame anyone else for your intended divorce,’ American blogger Rob Watson wrote in an open letter to a Christian couple in Australia who made the headlines after vowing to divorce should Australia legalize same-sex marriage.

‘If you choose to divorce because others might gain what you have valued in your life, you are not making a statement about marriage.  You are not making a statement about love. You are not making a statement about family. You are making a statement about your own damaged egos.

‘And it is time to grow up,’ said the gay rights activist and adoptive gay father of two sons in in Northern California.

Read more here.

 

jonraj500

Gay dad writes open letter to Mets player who ‘disagrees with the lifestyle, 100%’

‘We are not a lifestyle choice—we are a family’, says gay dad

Gay dad Jon Raj wrote an open letter to Daniel Murphy, the New York Mets second baseman who said he ‘disagrees with the [gay] lifestyle 100%.’

Describing himself and his young son as Mets fans, he said although he was disappointed and hurt by his comments, he was grateful that Murphy spoke his mind and had sparked a national conversation on LGBTI issues.

‘Let me try to explain why what you said was not an innocuous sound bite, but rather an offensive statement. First, I do not have a lifestyle. I didn’t choose my sexuality the same way you didn’t choose yours,’ he wrote in a column on Huffington Post.

‘Second, being gay is not what defines me, but rather it is just one important part of who I am. So when you say that you disagree with who I am, you are also disagreeing with my son and my family. We are not a lifestyle choice—we are a family.

‘Even though I am extremely disappointed and hurt by your remarks, I am grateful that you spoke your mind, as it has started a national conversation. The discussions taking place today on social media, in bars and churches, and around the dining room table are exactly how GLBT progress is achieved. I know it is hard moving to an unfamiliar position (think about your transition to second base), but with faith, openness and commitment, positive change can truly happen.

‘Some wonder how the gay rights movement has progressed so well so fast. To me it is quite simple: once you recognize that your brother, son, neighbor, or co-worker is gay, you don’t just continue to “love him” but you learn to actually accept and respect him for who he is as a person—and that changes everything.’

Read more here.

 

pavlovitz_huckabee

‘Please end this war against LGBT people,’ Christian pastor to Mike Huckabee

In April right after the passing of Indiana’s controversial Religious Freedom Restoration Act, North Carolina Christian Pastor John Pavlovitz (above, right) sent an Easter message ‘to all those fighting non-existent wars’ and want them to know that the gay community is not battling religion but discrimination. This message continues to be relevant as the majority of 2016 Republican US presidential candidates support similar legalization.

The pastor, who is best known for his blog post in which he vowed to love and support his children should they be gay when they are grown up, tried to set former Arkansas Governor Mike Huckabee right after the latter attacked LGBT activists in an interview in April, claiming that they wouldn’t be satisfied until there were no more churches or Christians in America.

In a message addressing ‘Governor Huckabee, and to all those fighting nonexistent wars’ published on his blog, Pavlovitz said, ‘He implies here that there are no LGBT people of faith, and that all LGBT people are hostile to religion.’

‘Both of these assumptions are terribly incorrect.’

He added, ‘Not everything needs to be a war.

‘Not everything needs to be a fight.

‘Not everything is about two opposing sides.

‘We’re all together in this life, seeking the very same things; life, liberty, and happiness.

‘I pray that you will see this deepest truth; you and those who might be conditioned to the battle, unable to lay down your weapons.

‘As a Christian, perhaps for the rest of this Holy Week, you might reflect upon the character of Christ, paying close attention to how he responded to those who differed from him, and to the “the least”; those who were vulnerable and hurting and desiring to be loved.

‘If you want to give the world outside of the Church a worthy Christian testimony this week, please consider an Easter cease-fire.

‘Please end this war.

‘Blessed are the peacemakers.’—Jesus

Read more here.