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12 weird butthole facts you might have never wanted to know

There is a gaping hole in your knowledge

12 weird butthole facts you might have never wanted to know
Cockyboys
Don't underestimate the power of butt hole knowledge

Can we all just talk about the amazing science behind your butthole?

Seriously, the human body’s gastrointestinal system has developed a way to take all of the amazing nutrients we need out of food. Before packaging what we don’t need, into neat little parcels we deliver at a socially acceptable point of the day.

Another thing science has given us for buttholes? Biological evidence of why some men love to bottom – hallelujah.

Oh and beyond that; bums are, of course, booty-ful.

So because the peach 🍑  is such a glorious part of our bodies and your butthole deserves a lot of attention; 🍆 – we’ve put together this guide with everything you need to consider when using your bum.

 

If men learn to control butthole muscles, you can spunk further

The same muscles you use to hold farts in are the same that help you spunk. The kegels or pelvic floor muscles are found by trying to stop peeing mid stream or just by tightening the muscles that keep you from passing gas. Just like any muscle, doing kegel exercises can make them stronger.

Top tip: if you want to improve your kegel muscles, you can’t use your buttocks, abs or thighs to help. So make sure you concentrate down on your pelvic muscles.

 

The average poop happens once every 24 hours

But some people only go once every three weeks, and some people go multiple times a day. Dr Patrica Raymond AKA Butt Meddler (the name on her YouTube channel) speaking on Why oh Why’s podcast says pooping is very individual. So long as you aren’t straining, or having to rush to the loo – how you poop is right for you.

 

Your rectum can come out of your bum

This is called rectal prolapse and can look quite alarming. It looks like a tubular structure, a little like a swiss roll.

It can happen when you’re pooping and pushing too hard. But you may also notice it happens when you cough or sneeze, or even when you’re doing everyday activities, such as walking or standing up. If this happens, you may need surgery, however, treatment may stay by simply introducing more fiber into your diet.

 

There is biological evidence about why gay and bi men bottom

Researchers believe they have discovered specific biological markers for gay men adopting preferred sexual positions. In other words, gay men might be predisposed to being a bottom or a top. The research shows that bottoms have indicators like having older brothers, being left-handed or not conforming to gender norms from an early age.

You can thank researchers at the University of Toronto Mississauga for this. They believe ‘non-right handedness’ is a major biological factor. Seriously, the study states: ‘Among gay men, variation in gender nonconformity appears to correspond with variation in anal sex role behavior.

 

Pains in your bum

Hemorrhoids happen around the plexus of veins in your anus lining which can bleed without any pain. However, there are also external ones can be painful and itchy. They happen when you bear down too hard when you’re trying to poop.

When it comes to these more painful external hemorrhoids, using some pre-moistened baby wipes and keeping the area clean is the best way to deal with them.  However, if they clot, they can become very painful. If this happens you have two options, you can wait until they heal or go see a doctor and they can cut the hemorrhoid off.

 

Doctors can literally feel anal cancer 

When doctors are performing a rectal exam, they’ll ask you to lay on your side before gloving and lubing up for a good old feel.

They’ll use their finger to feel around the inside of the rectum to see if they come across anything they shouldn’t from bleeding to abscesses. Doctors can use these exams to pretty quickly get a feel whether cancer is present, and then do more tests.

 

Still want to know more about your butthole being examined?

Of course, you do. And what better way to remember all the key facts about a colonoscopy than with a song. The self proclaimed Doctor Butt Medler has your back. With lyrics like, ‘if you don’t want the cancer, scopin is the answer’ you might need some intestinal fortitude for this one:

‘Doo, doo, doo,  looking up my back door.’

That’s just a standard Friday night for us, to be honest. What about you?

 

You can get botox for your butthole

For those of you who want to bottom like a virgin once more, you can now get your anus rejuvenated. This can be done with lasers, which literally tighten your anus. This can be a cosmetic operation. But the surgery was initially developed to help people with incontinence.

On the Sex Lives Magazine podcast, one journalist who has extensively researched butthole rejuvenation, Brian J Moylan describes it like Trivial Pursuit. Imagine your butthole like a trivial pursuit piece. The cosmetic surgery removes one piece, which are things like tears and hemorrhoids, when it’s gone naturally it will close up and be tighter.

 

People pass four liters of gas a day

That’s both farts and belching. Think about it as two-liter bottles of soda. It’s a lot of gas. You probably belch and even fart a little bit without even noticing most of the day.

If you’re planning on using your bum for sex, you might want to keep this in mind. Keeping that area clean is important for your comfort anyway, but it also something your partner will appreciate as well. Mary Berry isn’t the only one who doesn’t like a soggy bottom.

 

If you clench your anus, your farts will be noisier

When you tighten up because you feel the need to let rip, but it’s not a socially acceptable time that makes your farts louder. These noisy farts are because of something called aerophagia, which is swallowing air. Whether it’s drinking through a straw, chewing gum or having fizzy drinks – all this air has got to go somewhere.

Keep in mind, most of this will end up as those non-smelly but loud farts. This is because it is all just air. The reason there is noise is simply because we swallow so much air, and it’s gotta go somewhere fast. Think about when you purse your lips and blow out a raspberry – same principle. So if you really gotta fart (and you’re sure it’s just air) just relax – chances are it won’t smell anyway.

 

When your farts smell like something has died, it’s because something has

This happens when your body hasn’t absorbed something. Whether it’s carbs or grease, this dead partially digested food gets downstream to your colon and the bacteria that’s in there, eat and ferment what is left over. This is the process creating the smelly gas. Luckily, this kind of gas is generally in small volumes. So these are the farts to save for your own time.

Unfortunately, because these silent but deadly devils come in small amounts, this means people often miss the cue to purse and save it for later. So if you do smell it the person who made it might be just as surprised as you.

 

Dental Dams are for buttholes too

To prevent contracting a Shigellosis infection, consider using a dental dam when you’re rimming. Exposure to poo passes it during sexual contact with someone who already has it.

Shigellosis is an intestinal disease that causes bloody diarrhea, stomach pain, a fever and the constant need to poo even when your bowels are empty. Of course, keeping that whole area clean is important in keeping the shigellosis away too.

 

People with bigger butts are more intelligent

One study by the University of Pittsburgh and the University of California at Santa Barbara found that in the women they studied, the bigger their butt – the better they scored on cognitive tests.

Those with bigger hips and butts consistently beat their non-curvy counterparts. The thinking behind this is the hips and butt store essential omega-3 fatty acids which promote brain growth. This becomes an especially useful bank of nutrients for women during pregnancy. The study also showed that not only were the women with big butts more intelligent their kids were too.

 

Gym sex happens more often than you think

 

 


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