Did anyone feel like they couldn’t really enjoy Carol because they were just silently pleading with the screen, ‘Please, for once, don’t let the lesbians DIE’??
We’ve been so brainwashed to think that every film or TV show with a gay character is just going to end up with them kicking the bucket. Or falling in love with a straight person. Or turning straight.
That can’t happen anymore. So here it is Hollywood, 35 ideas that we thought of in 5 minutes. They’re yours.
- Two lesbians start to find each other attractive at work.
- Two lesbians start to find each other attractive at work. Twist is, they are zookeepers.
- Two lesbians start to find each other attractive at work. Twist is, they are the Prime Minister of Iceland and the President of the United States.
- Two lesbians start to find each other attractive at work. Twist is, they are astronauts.
- Lesbian invents an actual hoverboard. Hilarity ensues.
- Lesbian stumbles into a closet and discovers an old coat she hasn’t worn in ages. People ask her if it’s new and she feels pretty good about herself.
- Lesbian with really good gaydar is only one who can see and date a femme lesbian. The latter is invisible.
- Lesbian teams up with man to solve crime. Does not fall in love with him.
- Lesbian teams up with straight woman to find treasure. Does not fall in love with her.
- Lesbian teams up with bisexual woman in a relationship on a quest to save the world from gremlins. While she finds her attractive, lesbian respects the relationship and is able to move on and find someone who is available.
- A biopic of Barbara Jordan, the first African American and first gay woman to be elected to public office in Texas in 1973.
- A biopic of Hatshepsut, an Egyptian pharaoh who ruled by wearing male clothing, a false beard and apparently had a lot of female lovers.
- A biopic of Julie D’Aubigny, a 17th century French opera singer and fencing master who fought and won at least 10 life-or-death duels, performed nightly shows on the biggest opera stage in the world and once took the Holy Orders just so she could sneak into a convent and have sex with a nun.
- A biopic of Sally Ride, the first American woman to go into space. She was also the first LGBTI astronaut and remains the youngest American to have traveled to space at the age of 32.
- A biopic of Gigi Chao, the gay daughter of a Hong Kong billionaire. He offered $65 million to the man who was able to woo and marry her. It didn’t work, with Gigi continuing to be in a loving marriage with another woman.
- Two girls at school realise they are lesbian. They’re not each other’s type.
- Lesbian couple break up. Neither one of them goes psycho.
- Lesbian couple start dating. They do not move in together as they each like their own personal space.
- Lesbian couple date long distance. They make it work with regular communication.
- Lesbian couple get married. They don’t have kids because they don’t particularly like children, understand they’ll probably be bad parents and are fulfilled by work, travel and relationships.
- Poor lesbian starts dating rich lesbian. They have a respectful conversation about finances and make it work.
- Lesbian is given key to a door that opens to a world of ghosts. None of the ghosts are lesbian because they don’t have any unfinished business and everything is fine.
- Lesbian leaves horrible country to be gay. Ends up setting up a nail salon.
- Lesbian leaves horrible country to be gay. Ends up inventing an app that makes her millions.
- Lesbian leaves horrible country to be gay. Goes back home after a decade or two when they’ve decided to stop being horrible.
- A lesbian superhero saves people.
- A lesbian soccer player plays soccer.
- A lesbian goes into construction work and immediately gets a promotion because she’s awesome.
- A lesbian is fine with staying single.
- A lesbian mirror salesperson discovers her reflection is talking back to her.
- A lesbian manipulates her way into a powerful position in politics. Not because or through her sexuality, but because her mother taught her to be ambitious.
- Lesbian realises she is the descendant of a powerful race of druids who can talk to and transform into animals. Decides to get a law degree.
- Lesbian realises her older half-sister, who she knows gave a baby up for adoption 16 years ago, is actually her mother. It’s fine because she always kind of suspected it.
- Lesbian divorces husband. They are both very supportive and respectful of each other because they want the other to live a fulfilling and honest life.
- Lesbian falls in love with lesbian, they kiss, and they stay alive.
Do you have any more? Leave them in the comments below!