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The truth about gay men, sex and penis size

The surprising facts prove we have bigger things to worry about.

The truth about gay men, sex and penis size
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What is the ideal penis size?

We all know that penis size is one of men’s greatest obsessions but most don’t know the surprising truth behind the size myths.

Did you know, for example, that humans are better endowed than all our primate cousins? You may expect a gorilla to be better hung than you but you would be wrong, both in terms of absolute and relative size.

The subject has been firmly on the agenda with a couple of big stories over the last few weeks.

Over the weekend we heard a penis transplant on a 21-year-old in South Africa had apparently been a success. He had lost his penis in a botched circumcision at age 18 but now has a fully functioning member, capable of urination, erection, orgasm and ejaculation.

It makes you wonder if one day, lab-grown or donated penises will be grafted on to men who have extreme concerns over size.

And at the start of March we learned about a study of 15,000 penises, finally answering the question of average size.

The typical penis is just 13.12cms (5.16ins) long and 11.66cms (4.6ins) around when erect.

The study also busted the myth that size varies with race. While scientists say the sample wasn’t quite big enough to reach a firm conclusion on this, they found no link between size and race.

Most people assume average size is much bigger. 6ins or even 7ins are commonly quoted figures.

Despite everyone wanting to be big, we tend to underestimate our own size too. The angle at which you look down on your penis leads you to think it’s smaller than it really is and if you have any fat on your belly, that only makes it worse.

There’s evidence gay men take all this particularly seriously. A study by Utrecht University in the Netherlands around a decade ago showed penis length had a big impact on gay men’s self esteem.

In the worst cases men – gay, bi and straight – can suffer from body dysmorphic disorder. This can even lead to anti-social behavior, depression and suicide.

No wonder newspaper and web advertising continuously pushes various methods to increase size. Of course, it is very well established none of them work. The fact we keep trying, however, is the clearest signal of all that most of us believe bigger is better.

But perhaps the biggest question of all is not about average size but about how important it is in sex.

Let’s start with the assumption you can’t dismiss this notion of being ‘big’ as entirely worthless. After all, on the internet there are rather more searches made for ‘world’s biggest dick’ but very few links for the shortest.

In my last article I looked at the imbalance of power between tops and bottoms, provoking some very interesting comments from GSN readers.

I have noticed in particular that bottoms tend to look for ‘more hung’ men and I often seen tops boasting about their size and capacity on dating sites.

I have often seen gay relationships fail after three or four sex meetings. After this it seems everyone wants to put their hands in a new man’s underwear, wondering what new and big thing they will find there. Can this size worship be one reason gay romances are so fragile?

My first relationship was with someone I met online was with a guy I met on Facebook. We chatted a lot on phone, including talking about sex and he boasted about his size a lot.

So when we met in person I was a little shocked to see his little master. Not shocked that it was anything unusual but only because of the mental picture he put in my mind.

Despite this, I have to say I really enjoyed myself with him and the smaller-than-advertised size of his penis made no difference at all. Frankly I can say we had some of the best sex I’ve ever had in my life.

I’ve met plenty of guys in my time, of all different sizes, but honestly as a bottom I can’t agree that bigger is always better. I simply can’t say that I have had better experience with larger guys.

The law of averages means, of course, that most of the sex I’ve had has been with guys with an average penis. And from that, I’ve taken the very clear lesson that having sex is not just about the sex – it’s an important moment, which is only good when you feel safe with someone and your partner treats you well.

For me the kisses and embraces are the most important part. The love and the quality of the time you give each other means more than size. Sex is not limited to physical intercourse. Mental satisfaction is what it’s all about. And I can promise you – if you are worried about your own size – that in bed, it’s not your partner’s length or girth but their performance that matters.

To me, the idea that size is important in gay sex is just a myth. If you are craving for a bigger penis for yourself, or for your lovers, remember that ‘bigger is better’ is not always true.

First published 17 March 2015


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HAVE YOUR SAY

    Noting that this article is in GAYSTARNEWS I find it odd so many of these posts speak of satisfying “any woman”. There are NO exercises to increase penis size. 4 inches in 4 weeks is bullshit. Tying a rope to your dick would cause irreparable harm to it. Where would 4 inches of new penis miraculously come from?

    Mina Ite says:

    In sex a penis 8 – 17 cm is the best, because bigger and too thick penis is mostly worse to suck the most good way and feels worse in fucking. In ass the only sensitive areas are at the anus and just 5 cm deep – and in deeper nothing areas that feels good. And most matters how good one can use his penis and how good he is in sex and love else way. (and in heterosexual sex too all the sensitive parts of woman are not deep) Men with smaller or middle size penis get the best sucking and blowjob, because their penis is perfect size for sucking all the good ways. Men with very big penis sure never can enjoy so good sucking. If someone just wants to worship big penis, then whales have the biggest penises. So feel free to slide in the oceans.

    Under that article,there are at least ten advertizes for larger penis

    15,000 penises and their sample wasn’t enough to be sure about a link between size and race.?

    Robert House, Consider that most medical studies, with results that get wordlwide application, are commonly done on far less than 15,000 people.

    Robert House Let us know when you’ve checked out those 3.5 billion mens junk and post a report of your findings here for us to read please.

    Robert House says:

    yes. Consider there are approximatly 3.5 Biilion men on the planet. 15k is an absurdly small number to make it statistically signifcant.

    I personally don’t like extra thick penises because I have a hard time breathing or being able to suck. Online i will make sure early on that the guy doesn’t want a big dick. If he does then I move on right away. Now im with my bf, who is a twink bottom. I know he doesn’t want a huge dick in him but I still get a little worried that he isnt telling me that he wants a guy with a bigger penis. I really want to make him vocal during sex, but my age and size make that more of a challenge. We are really in love even after two years, so he might be okay with my very average size, but my performance could be better!

    This is really sad. Except for one posting, this entire thread has been taken over by spammers.

    Robert House oh hello i am just on my own i have no one to have sex with i have not hd sex of a man before i’m so randy i want it

    Robert House says:

    Odd. Maybe it’s my add blocker but I don’t see any spam at all. All good comments.

    How To Make A Female Orgasm: Know Her Body To Give Her Earth Shaking Orgasms – fb.me/4l9lFROuD

    Steve Sauder says:

    It’s utterly hilarious that all of the comments on this article about penis size and how it’s not important for satisfying sex – are all spam commments about .. Penis enlargement, (*sigh*)

    Yep! It is just a matter of finding the right guy who is accepting of your dick size. Then it is important to eat right, exercise and get enough sleep. Alcohol/drugs can also diminish one’s sexual performance, so be aware.

    I wish anyone contemplating suicide should get the help they need. Size isn’t worth killing yourself over so please don’t be stupid with your life it’s very precious GET HELP!!!

    Mars Omila says:

    Size doesn’t matter, its the performance that counts.

    Eric Arthur says:

    Size. It matters 100 o/o. What is the use if your partners penis is to big to comfortably penetrate you.What is the use if your tongue has no space to work wonders.Small to medium is best.Bigger ,exhibitionists only.

    Uranus stretches. Look it up, or just believe someone that could fit a small truck up there.

    great aticle I’m 79 nrrd someone to talk to.

    The fact of the matter is, mankind has known how to enlarge, strengthen and empower their penises for many thousands of years, using simple and effective exercises you can find HERE http://bit.ly/2cDQt1n

    What ever the situation, the both sexes adore large penis if not, why do men go head over heels to enlarge?

    maybe because they’re stoopid?

    Owen Backer says:

    Size has zero to do with love so i

    Richard Dey says:

    This is not an article for gay men; ;it is an article for heterosexual women. The first thing that eliminates most men from the gay “jean” pool is what makes acceptable to the straight gene pool. Microphallic men survive only with hard cash ratherthan hard dick.

    Tmark Keefey says:

    Size has zero to do with love so if a person is interested in size no matter what your size, avoid them so you avoid problems in a relationsip since if size matters to one, they have a serious problem going on to start with psycologically. Even hetero sex it doesn’t matter since female orgasm is not from his size so size certainly has zero to do with orgasms between two guys but there are those out for love & thouse out for other things so beware.

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